My Love

So there's this wonderful guy named Jualez I met exactly 7 months ago. He is my boyfriend, my best friend, my lover, and my world. Even though he means more to me than anything in this universe I am scared of him.
Every time I grow attached to someone they leave. When they leave I get depressed. When I get depressed I turn into a zombie. I think that stupid phase people go through sometimes when they found the right person and get scared has hit me. I think that some times girls do stupid shit like go out with assholes because they know what to expect. We know what to expect from an asshole. I think we fear finding a good man because we will fall extra hard; and if we were ever to lose Mr. Perfect we would lose our minds. I know if I lose Jualez I would go fuckin crazy. I'd most likely be institutionalized. I have never met anyone like him and I don't think I ever will. I'm kind of crying right now, and it's hard for me to find the words to express how I feel.
I have never met someone so perfectly compatible with me. I have never found someone I can be completely open with and in return he be completely open with me. I have never found someone who I didn't have awkward silences with. It's ridiculously easy and I'm not used to anything being so effortless that it scares me. I love his outspokenness and how loving and caring he is. I wrote this stupid "Letter to the Universe" on my laptop asking for the perfect guy and after I started going out with him I was like oh shit when I read it again because he was literally everything I asked for.
I thought about something he said to me earlier, "When I love someone I give 110% and you risk getting hurt when you love someone." I will stop acting like a douche and do just that. I love him too much to lose him. I want to care for him and treat him how he deserves to be treated. He is my King, and I his Queen. It's about time I act like it dammit!
Something that I will work on is remembering things. I'm going to keep a diary of the things me and him do so I never forget anything that happened (fuck my shitty memory). I don't want him to feel as if I forgot because it didn't matter. I actually try to savor the time I spend with him and sometimes I don't want to sleep because I don't want to waste any of the precious time we share. I had a habit if forgetting exactly how people look, it may sound weird, but I do. He's like the only person I can always imagine and remember. From his scent, to envisioning him, to the sound of his voice I can imagine/remember perfectly. I think its because I look at him and sniff him so much XD
But yeah, he's the greatest guy in the world and it doesn't get better than this. I will always want him and even as we grow old together, he will keep me young. We will both have young spirits and I will never let my love fade as some people do. I can't wait for me and him to get the hell out of our parents houses XD